... rose petals, lemongrass, several kinds of tea, wine, beer, ginger, and curry. (Not all at once, natch.) I discovered a new Trevor Superpower: evacuating Chinese from pools. When they saw the big laowai with hair all over his face, chest, and legs get in the pool and then squeeze the air bubble out of his baggy swim trunks they would exit as soon as they felt it would be polite. Perhaps two or...

...amazing-let’s-bond-and-be-bestest-friends-just-cos-we’re-both-foreigners-in-China!” kind of things which I’m not a fan of, but just your simple nod of acknowledgement. And that’s when I got it - The Laowai Death Stare. I’m sure all of you have encountered it before, the hostile glare from the foreigner who seems to be saying to you silently: “Hey! What are you doin’ here? This is MY China! I’m...

Thought about this after hanging out in Shanghai for a couple of days. Top ten signs you might be a Laowai. 1) You’re wearing ipod headphones but you’re not actually listening to anything. You’re just trying to not be bothered. 2) You’re wearing really dark sunglasses and don’t look at anyone 3) You’re wearing hiking boots for walking around town 4) You’re complaining about China in English and you...