`Read the journal from bottom up` This is my last entry No more ~~ Her breath was bated as she waited, Patiently as a child her beheading arrives, The man with her fate brings the blade up high, I love you my darling, I love you goodbye... ~~ ~smh~ 10-08  

Today I made a comment about how I've been eating too much lately and am starting to get fat. My friends just nodded along and agreed with me. I must be fatter than I thought.

Friday, we took my dog Hannibal to the animal hospital and had him put to sleep. He was eleven years old; pretty old for a Shepherd mix with terrible arthritis in his hips. He was in constant pain from...the task. Words themselves aren't enough. The best I seem to be able to manage is a paraphrase from the Epic of Gilgamesh. He who was my friend through hardship and joy is gone forever.

The labour weekend is over, and everyone who was here has finally gone home. it was fun while it lasted, and i even managed to build some more stuff, but over the course of today things took a crash...in that world. I cannot help thinking sometimes i am both a disappointment and an embarrassment to her as well. well if you actually read this, thank you for your forbearance chin chin.

New Jersey is just a weird place. It was sweltering hot over the weekend and today it snowed for like two hours. Snow? In October? In the tri-state area? I thought the globe was supposed to be warming... They're quite good. That's what I have lately. Books and films. Books and films and homework. Books and films and homework and food. Books and film and homework and food and sleep. That's it.

Today I was driving home from work, I drive through a pretty traditional small catholic town (it has st. in the name) I was very pleased to see some folks with a rainbow peace flag and signs that talked... but I also tell him he might be able to learn this through other means such as americorps. I'm sad that my son will not have his grandfather to talk with has he begins make decisions about his future

Alpha Phi Omega's conclave was this weekend at Quinippiac. It was a lot of fun. The leads program in the morning was a little boring, because the power was out and we couldn't see the power point, but...will be do. Ah well, Here's to hoping. And here's to Halloween.... I hope its fun! Ugh... and I've gotta pay Hartford 9,000 dollars so I can register for class..... I feel so behind. So stuck

Even though you lost two people on your support staff who you had long relationships with (not to mention great support from) You can't be sad for long about it. You have to say to yourself...hey I knew...change my perspective a bit at the same time. Its time to let go. And yes, its hard, but you have to do it anyway. Life is hard sometimes, and you , my dear self, have no exemption from that fact

Photographer: Kellah # of Photos: 32 Theme(s): 8 (touch), 13 (irony), 14 (wrong), 17 (muse), 20 (pale), 22 (torn), 23 (scars), 25 (drops), 27 (dry), 40 (loss), 41 (wonder), 46 (chair), 50 (breath), 55 (wash), 56 (corner), 59 (two), 61 (music), 62 (rope), 63 (decrepit), 65 (dream), 70 (soul), 71 (lock), 72 (key), 73 (rust), 74 (find), 76 (drag), 79 (swing), 80 (meeting), 81 (vacant), 87 (wait...

so i got a call, from him. its amazing how you can go 8 months with out talking to someone, think you are over them, then when confronted with brutal clairty of voice, realize they still make your heart...turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It's a soul-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. I hate love.”